“some way bi”

In the weeks leading to Christmas, the stress of 2020 started to weigh on me. I mean, I’ve had periods of feeling anxious, gloomy, and drained throughout the year but nothing like how I was feeling the beginning of this month and several weeks following that. I was feeling all the UNs. *Insert all the words* – UNmotivated, UNproductive, UNenthusiastic and whatever UNs you may think of. I’m sure some of you can relate. This year was so messed up, I wasn’t even trying to find solace in my friends and family knowing that they may be going through similar emotional and mental absurdity. Although, I appreciate the few that checked in frequently.

But how is tomorrow 2021?

All year, I’ve tried many times to transcribe my thought or record my podcast. Each time my brain fails me. It’s like my brain is reluctant to forward the message to my hands to instruct my fingers to pick up that pen and write. This has never happened to me. Words come so easily to me when I sit to share my thoughts but this year is different. So yes, 2020 has been “some way bi.”

My word coming into 2020 was to be intentional. Intentional with my actions, with my words and with my thoughts. Intentional with the company I keep, making a conscious effort to widen my professional circle. I’m moving forward to 2021 with the same mantra.

I find it necessary to share this to emphasize the importance of sharing not just our successes but also our struggles especially in the world of social media. To normalize not feeling okay. To accept having not just a day off but weeks off.

In spite of all that has happened in 2020, I am thankful and looking forward to a better 2021.

-JOZY

-@personalstorieswithjozy